Lou & Peter Berryman

In the nineties, I was in a duo with fellow musician and friend, John Giver. He had approached me with the notion of performing humerous music that he had written as well as quirky songs by others. Until that time I hadn't played much on my own and was just coming into the open mike scene. As soon as John introduced me to Lou & Peter Berryman, I knew he had something. We learned the wordy duets by Lou & Peter as well as songs by Christine Lavin, Martin Mull and other funny songwriters. We even held a contest to name our group and the winning entry was Postage Due, implying we weren't all there.

On stage, performing this musical comedy, my stage fright would disappear with the first laugh from the audience. Of all the songs were learned and performed, without a question, Lou and Peter's songs were always my favorites. Among them, Do You Think Its Going to Rain?; Crab Canape, Your State's Name Here; We Strolled on the Beach; Why Am I Painting the Living Room; Odd Man Out; Chat With Your Mother; Family Car and more than I can think of right now. Just the names should just you an idea of how silly these songs are.

The Berrymans are a folk duo from Madison, Wisconsin. They had been married for seven years then divorced but continued to be friends and bandmates. Their songs touch every possible subject and can cause listeners to cry with laughter. They have dozens of CD's with their thirty years of songs.

We had the honor and privilege of hearing them as well as meeting them on Saturday, October 25th at the Ark in Ann Arbor, Michigan. They were as charming as they are hilarious. We chatted about some of the songs that Postage Due performed and they made a list of the audiences favorites to perform in the second set. My favorite song to perform is "Orange Cocoa Cake" a tribute to multi-tasking! Please, please check them out on YouTube and watch for them to be at a venue near you.

Get Outta Here - The Ark in Ann Arbor

A few weeks ago, during intermission at the Leo Coffeehouse, Papa Joe suggested that we take a Get Outta Here to the Ark in Ann Arbor. We are members of the Queen City Balladeers which was founded in 1963 and presents the Leo Coffeehouse, one of the oldest continuously run music coffeehouses in the United States. The Ark is either #1 or #2.

Joe checked his iPhone and saw that Lou and Peter Berryman were performing on October 25th. We agreed on the location and theme of our GOH, now we had to determine who was going along. Phil, Karen, Joe, Carol, Jim and I confirmed so I made reservations, we bought tickets and set off for Ann Arbor.

We had a great ride, enjoying the autumn colors as we rode north. Phil and Karen arrived a day early and were already checking out downtown Ann Arbor. We arrived in early afternoon, checked into the same motel and then drove to meet them. We walked about the town looking into windows and doing just a bit of shopping before choosing a Chinese restaurant for dinner. The food was marvelous and the service attentive. We had two large bags of left overs that the guys put into the car before we headed to the concert. After our meal we joined the throng of people on Main Street, most of them of fans roaming downtown after the Michigan v. Michigan football game. We headed into the Ark around 7:30 and after a few seat changes, found just the right spot. Being musicians, a few of us needed to see the guitar from house left. Its informative to watch the musicians and seeing which chords and riffs are play on certain songs. We laughed like crazy at the hysterical show by two very funny and talented individuals. If you need a laugh or want to be impressed by musicians who use many, many, many words, google Lou & Peter Berryman of Madison, Wisconsin. I'll write more about them in another blog.

We got back to the motel and some of our leftovers while watching Saturday Night Life in the lobby. Joe and Phil were offered a small conference room and they jammed for a couple hours more. We reconnoitred in the lobby again on Sunday morning and enjoyed breakfast and an hour or so of laughs.

Sadly, Jim got sick in the middle of the night and stayed that way all the way home. His stomach did not enjoy the GOH although the rest of him had a great time.

"Once I Met a President"

My song Perfect Hands includes the line: "Once I met a President, Bill Clinton was his name"

I really did meet President Clinton as well as Hillary, Al and Tipper among other celebrities. My husband, Jim, his siblings and I were invited to the White House Correspondents Dinner in 1997. Yes, it was a long time ago, but I keep seeing President Clinton on TV and talk shows and remember that magical night as if it were yesterday. I felt like Cinderella dressed up for a ball. I talked with George Clooney and Ellen DeGeneres and Ann Heche. Although the White House Photographer took an official photo of our family with the President, I like this one because you can read the excitement on my face as I prepare to shake hands with the most power man in the world. As my song states "He was tall and handsome and his hands were quite divine...but the Secret Services scared me. Perfect hands are hard to find"

Later, after the dinner, we danced and smoozed at the Vanity Fair Party at the Old Russian Trade Misson along side of Biannca Jagger, Tom Selleck, Robert DeNiro and other celebrities. We looked pretty spiffy, too.


I've been working on my little book "The Art of the Get Outta Here" and was listing my top ten GOH's. That GOH is Number One!

The Ribbon - Part Twelve

June 9, 1988
On June 9th I had slept in since it was so cloudy and cold. About 8:30 a.m. I wandered up to the wheelhouse and was told that we had reached Shawneetown but there were no barges ready for us. Shawneetown is the oldest settlement in Illinois. The pilot said we had passed on some barges during the night that weren't ready for us. We had been in a spot between Evansville and Paducah which was not in a strong radar path and the marine operator couldn’t pick us up.
Having no barges to load, we just sat waiting for further orders. The boat slowly wandered up the river and passed Peabody Mine. The Peabody has a seven mile long conveyor, the longest in the world, which loads coal from the mines, down to the barges.

At 4:00 p.m. we had finally received word regarding our barges and headed for Harrisonville to pick them up. We were headed for Uniontown Lock.

Dave called his wife and she said all was fine at home. She reported that the car was sounding bad and will need some work when he got back. Problems on land seem a million miles away when you're sitting out on the river. There was nothing that could be done so there was nothing to worry about. Car problems are a perfect example of why the families back home need support from the company so the crew doesn’t have to worry.

About 8:30 p.m. a harbor tug named Spirit brought over the first of the coal barges. The deck hands were hooking it up and I watched every detail of what went on. After one of the barges was measured, it was too deep, 9'3" and with the low river they couldn't take that one.

In the evening after dinner I sat with the Captain and watched the sun set parallel to the river. The water was a pale baby blue and the sky near the horizon pale pink with light mauve clouds. The tree line at this stretch of river was very even and was forest green. The sky above the pink turned faint blue and increased in color toward the east. The view was too panoramic to capture on film so we just sat and enjoyed the serenity of nature as we listened to the calls and commands of the crew. The beauty faded fast as the noisy little tug brought over more barges.

We headed toward the Uniontown Lock at 11:30 p.m. I stayed up to watch as we entered the lock. It looked like it might be a little perilous because the river below us was windy due to the islands sitting out in the water. The pilot and the lock master talked by radio and the lock master sent a tug to meet us and take five of our coal barges through the lock. He went in first and as the water rose, we watched for his wheelhouse to appear.

Our turn to enter the lock and the mate was out on the barges, shouting distances to the pilot. “300 feet to the gate” would mean the head of the tow was entering the long chamber with that much distance to the far gate. A normal long haul tow has fifteen barges and measures about 1,000 feet or about a ¼ of a mile in length. A lock chamber is normally 1,200 feet long. A shout of “2 Feet” would mean the tow was entering with two feet on the mate’ side between the barges and the lock wall. When a towboat is in a lock chamber, there is minimal space between the lock wall and the boat. Huge bumpers are thrown into the water to keep the boat from physically touching the wall thus preventing sparks if the metal hit concrete. The interchange between the pilot and the mate was the only conversation allowed in the wheelhouse when locking through. Every few seconds the mate would call another distance reading and the pilot would maneuver the boat at just the right speed, advancing or reversing engines to get her in. Once she was in the pilot would cut her engines and sit still in the chamber.

Large ropes, called lines, were attached to the elevators which rise at the same level as the water, holding the boat in place. It is pure magic when a pilot can perfectly manage the engines to hold a boat in place, no matter how fast the current.

We made it through the lock at 2:00 a.m. and I went off to try to sleep to the sound of the barges being reconnected from the little tug. Breakfast came early and I enjoyed eating with the crew.

Pumpkin Patch

"If your soul get's snatched, in the Pumpkin Patch. Who ya gonna call?" The Sweeneys

We had a blast at the College Hill Pumpkin Patch this year. The weather was sunny and not too hot. Tim, Jim, Peg and I performed for 45 minutes and included such seasonal fair as "Ghost Busters', "Monster's Lullaby" and "Urge for Going".

Two of our grandsons, Brody and Chase, were with us and sat quietly while we performed. Afterwards they enjoyed games and crafts.

Happy Pumpkin Days.

My Knee - What a Pain!

Well, the knee isn't improving and its bringing me down. It hurts from time to time but the true pain of it all is the restriction of movement. My grand kids call me Mimi instead of Grandma 'cause I thought it would make me feel old. NOTHING makes me feel as old as limping around on a cane. Yes, its pity pot time. I can't walk in the Walk for Kids for Children's Hospital or any other that requires the ability to ambulate. I hobble.

I go back to Dr. Harding in November and will cry on his shoulder. I hope he has big shoulders. But I'll continue to chant my mantra that its not really that bad, just a little challenging. That which does not kill us ...blah, blah, blah.

My Wedding Hat

Ahh, the wedding hat. In all four weddings of my own, I never wore a hat or veil. Therefore, I enjoy wearing weddings hats at someone else's celebration.

On Saturday, October 4th, Jim and I had the honor of attending the wedding of one of our dearest friends, Jackie Skinner Reynolds. I've known Jackie since we were 9 when we met at church in Newport, Kentucky. Soon after, her famly moved to Southgate, then Ft. Thomas and we didn't see each other much until Jr. High, when I briefly attended Highlands. I then again attended Highlands Highland for a short time during high school and we met back up.

Jackie was the first friend to help me with music. In the late 60's, she and I would play at coffeehouses and get togethers that were held at churches and other venues. Jackie was a natural born musician and was patient with me as I was not.

This Saturday she married her long-time love, David. She was glowing, as all brides should be, and their happiness was apparent. Both musical and creative people, their union was meant to be.

A wonderful lesson on love at all ages and at any time of life.

All our love and best wishes to Jackie and David.

You Can't Go Home Again

On the last Sunday in September, one of the first days we had no big plans or events, I took a peaceful drive to Taylorsport, Kentucky. I had lived in Taylorsport during the end of 1988 and the beginning of 1989. My brother had started up his towboat company and moved the office to Taylorsport. The sunroom of a dilapidated house which had originally been a house boat was the official location of IMS and my new workspace. Like many folks who work from home, I just had to get out of bed, grab my coffee and walk a few steps to my desk and computer. Well, that was short lived because my brother then decided to purchase the little store on the corner and turn it into a river store. A river store is essential because it has the ability to complete grocery orders for towboats and then get them to the boat, either while loading coal at a nearby facility, while locking through or by yawl. We moved the office, again, to the back of the little store and were able to not only carry on towing and barge business but sell groceries to towboats and local.


I went back to Taylorsport this past weekend to see how it might look after 20 years. It was so changed that I drove right past the store. The gas pump in the front was gone and the store had been converted into a family home. The little houseboat which had become a house, was even more dilapidated and seemed to be falling apart. The sunroom was closed in and a second story was added over it. Pretty scary.


I drove back towards town and for old times sake, parked my car and walked down to the Anderson Ferry. I had spent all my cash at McGlasson's Farm buying pumpkins, mums and tomatoes so there wasn't enough money for me to take the van across to Cincinnati. Standing by the boat I read that foot passengers were only fifty cents. Wow, I had that much in my pocket. When the ferry made it to the Kentucky side of the river, I walked on, gave the gentleman one dollar so I could ride both ways and said hello to the skipper. Riding back and forth on one of the prettiest days of the year, I thought about times long gone. I realized that I had been riding this ferry for more than fifty years. The last time I had ridden it, though, was when my stepfather's funeral possession took the ferry on the way to Cleves for his burial. As we rode that day I was curious as to why Captain Louis Hammond hadn't wanted to be cremated and have his ashes spread across the waves as we rode this ferry. I was saddened to learn that he had actually asked for that very thing but my stepbrother had overridden his wishes and given him a full burial.


The saddest part for me isn't only that you can't go home again, its that most of the homes I had are no longer there. It might seem a bit silly for me to miss some more than others seeing that I have lived in almost 50 different places in my life.


When I was born we lived in what was known as The Projects in Newport. They have been torn down for condos to overlook the Cincinnati skyline. The next home, my maternal grandparents' house where we lived off and on most of my early live, has been replaced by an office building near Newport on the Levee. The two locations where we lived on the river side of the floodwall in Newport are not at all the places I grew up. Our spot when we lived at Big Rock Harbor is now occupied by Hooters and the spot where our trailer was when I was in my late teen's is now becoming a million dollar condominium site. Wouldn't my parents and grandparents be shocked. The view we had in my childhood for next to nothing now costs big, big bucks. We had it and were considered river trash. How times change.

Its ironic that I now live in the home that my natural father owned. He divorced my mother when I was just born and I never lived there until after he died and left it to me. I had only been in the living room three times. So, its not like going home at all.

I'm happy nonetheless. I do miss the house my grandparents owned but it was old and falling apart, having survived the 1939 flood before the floodwall was built. I have photographs to bring back memories.

Now my house is "grandma's house" and I hope it will be there for many years so my kids and grandkids can "come home again".

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